RAWR

I don't have a single pageview yet. Oh my god.

You guys suck. I should have, like, seven-hundred followers. Minimum.

Look at Amy, she started a blog fucking bashing you guys and she had fans left and right! IT'S BECAUSE I'M WHITE, ISN'T IT? Or is it because I speak Spanish?

But hey, at least I'm not fucking lampshading having followers and comments. Like "HEY WOW I HAVE FOLLOWERS NOW" or "HERP DERP I DUNNO WHY YOU GUYS ARE FOLLOWING ME BUT I GUESS THE FACT THAT I'M A FICTIONAL CHARACTER AND THIS BLOG WAS INTRODUCED IN A THREAD ON THE FEAR MYTHOS FORUM MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT."


That's another thing. Writing Rule #2: We know it's fictional. Don't push it.


Writing Rule #3 is Don't be a hypocrite, but I can't really think of any examples of that one, so I'll let it slide. Maybe you assholes aren't half-bad after all.